Monday, June 7, 2010

A late fee and a revelation

So I have a late fee since I haven't paid my one (count it, people, ONE!!!!) actively used credit card on time. I seriously don't have a clue what happened. You would think with only one card, I would remember to pay on time and in full. Oh well. I will call them tonight and work something out. I checked online and the last time I paid late (and called and got the late charge taken off) was after Christmas 2008. January, to be exact. So at least it's not recent.

In other news, I was looking through some old photos of myself and realized that I don't look the same as before. Before what? Before everything. The layoff, the family issues, the pain, the stress, the sleeping too much replaced by the sleeping too little, the not eating right, the not exercising. My skin doesn't glow anymore, my hair is blah. In a way, everything that has happened to me could not go unnoticed to my appearance. I just didn't realize how much it had.

I used to look at people like me and think "Gosh, what happened?" Life, that's what happens.

I got excited about something so small this weekend: planning it and making choices. It felt so foreign yet so good. I think when my life became dictated by everyone else, I sort of gave up making choices and making myself feel better. I guess that should be my goal for the next month: Make more decisions and feel more in control of my life and thus, happier.